The external introvert?

I haven't pushed anything out recently, despite the intention. I will try to change, as always.

When I was growing up, I was very much an introvert. That's not to say that I didn't have friends, but I had no problem being alone. I actually enjoyed it, sometimes preferred it. What the hell happened?

I used to disappear for hours into the forest behind our house. There were various forts to retreat into, trees and hills to climb, and a horse farm and golf course to explore. Not to mention just walking through the woods on trails (later, I would learn that this is called "hiking". Apparently, I did a lot of hiking when I was younger).

I would delve deep into my mind, explore there. I don't remember having anyone to talk about any of this with. I read a lot, which opened me up to a lot of ideas that I'm not sure that I fully absorbed.

I wouldn't call myself an extrovert, but my introverted self is no longer in control. I get lonely easily, sometimes. I get jealous and angry. I fall in love everyday, three or four times (okay, this happened when I was younger too, when I was the kind of having un-acted-upon-crushes). Sometimes though, I need to think. And keep thinking. When I do, it's not always easy to stop or find someone to explain what I'm think to.